a shortie about what I think should be improved when it comes to Pride festivals… visibility for everyone sure would be nice!
One day… soon…
‘capacity | overload’ by Creatrix Tiara
this is sort of a duet, in that it has the perspective of both people in this (difficult) relationship, but is sung by one person.
Lyrics by Creatrix Tiara (with some sorta-anonymous input)
Music by Apple Loops (I wish I had an actual musician to work with)
sort of a duet - perspectives of both people in this (difficult) relationship, but is sung by one of them.
‘Just Give Me a Reason’ by Pink
Just give me a reason
Just a little bit’s enough
Just a second we’re not broken just bent
And we can learn to love again
It’s in the stars
It’s been written in the scars on our hearts
That we’re not broken just bent
And we can learn to love again
Charice Pempengco Is Gay: Filipina Actress and Singer Comes Out
If you thought you sensed sexual tension in this video — good eye!
Yup, Charmaine Clarice Relucio…
The Sidis are a small community of Indians of African descent.
Photographer Ketaki Sheth has documented their lives for a new book, A Certain Grace: The Sidi - Indians of African Descent, published by Delhi-based gallery Photoink.
It is estimated that 60,000 to 75,000 Sidis live in the western state of Gujarat and the southern state of Karnataka. Fewer numbers live in the state of Goa and in the cities of Mumbai and Hyderabad.
Their ancestors, say historians, were slaves, soldiers, traders, pearl divers and Muslim pilgrims who arrived in India over centuries. A large number of them, they say, also arrived in India as free citizens.
Historian Mahmood Mamdani says the ordinary Sidi were descendants of slaves brought by Portuguese down the coast of East Africa, mainly from Mozambique. “The big difference with Atlantic slavery was that hardly any slaves were brought to India to provide cheap labour… Their main attraction was not their cheapness, but their loyalty”, he says.
Ketaki Sheth says the Sidis have lived in India for over half a century. “Except for one or two people I photographed, no-one has visited Africa. The older generation too feel rooted in India,” she says.
“Except for their dance (called Goma, from the Swahili word, ngoma, meaning both drum and dance) and some exorcism rituals which have roots in Africa, they are Indian in language, customs, dress, food and temperament,” says Ms Sheth. The Sidis of Gujarat, for example, speak Gujarati as their mother tongue.
The Sidis are “poor for the most part”, Ms Sheth says. They get some affirmative action benefits from the government as they are classified as “scheduled tribes”, one of India’s most disadvantaged groups.
Mahmood Mamdani says a Sidi elder told him that a girl marrying outside the caste or community is usually thrown out. He said the prohibition on marriage outside the community is more because of “interest than identity”. Outsiders, the Sidis fear, will take advantage of the affirmative action benefits.
“Whenever I asked a Sidi person I met whether they thought of themselves as African or Indian, I inevitably got a quizzical look. What, they seemed to think, was wrong with me: they were of course, Indians,” says Mahmood Mamdani.
I hate how this article leaves out the fact of just how long the Siddi have been in India (several centuries) along with the fact that the Siddi also established small principalities in India as early as the twelfth century and weren’t just confined to being “poor for the most part,” even though that conveniently fits into the narrative of what black people are “supposed” to be like historically. One of those principalities that they controlled, Janjira, was the only fort on India’s entire west coast to remain undefeated despite repeated Dutch, Maratha, and English East India Company attacks, and Siddis were renowned warriors and mercenaries as well for a long time.
Actually true, they made it seem like Africans would not have reached Indian without the help of Europeans. Which is interesting because the BBC itself has previously reported on how the monsoon winds helped facilitate trade between East Africa and South Asia for centuries.
On the plus side they did mention that not all the Africans that arrived in India were slaves which is something that tends to be glossed over.
I saw an exhibit on Africans in India at the Schomburg Center for Research in Black Culture in NY last month. Very interesting!
One of my biggest fantasies for a while now has been to get a cut-throat shave - something not easy to accomplish if you are a femme-ish cis-ish woman! Temescal Alley Barber Shop indulged my request and I got to make a dream come true :D
Trans cartoonists sought for ongoing project about trans history through comic art. Contact Christa Smith at christinecdsmith@gmail.com for details.
Being an artist means forever healing your own wounds and at the same time endlessly exposing them.
The Washington Post profiles several queer and transgender Muslims who attended a special retreat for LGBTQ Muslims. I encourage you to read their stories.
SheZow - A gender-bending superhero!
She-Zow is an Australian-Canadian cartoon about a twelve-year-old boy, Guy, an all-American kid who loves skateboarding, video games, and lots of typical “boy” stuff. But he then discovers a magical ring that when activated, gives him superpowers - and changes him into a girl. SheZow’s super powers include super speed, super strength, a sonic scream, and an array of super cool AND girly gadgets. Also, the way that Guy transforms into SheZow is him saying “You go, girl!”
I’ve seen the first episode, and one thing I love is that although Guy has both his sister and his best friend who knows his identity, he is afraid to tell his dad that he’s SheZow. But his fear doesn’t come from his dad hating the idea of Guy being a girl superhero, but because Guy’s dad is a cop and believes that SheZow is a troublemaking vigilante who takes away from his job. So the show takes away as many elements of gender and gender-expression shaming away, making the gender shift both the forefront of the show, but pretty much unimportant as an issue for the characters.
Of course, conservative groups like Focus on the Family have a problem with such a show. They say that SheZow will “teach gender confusion” and “promote transgenderism in children,” all of which are simply ridiculous notions. They think that they’re trying to “protect” kids from gender, but what they’re really saying is that they take issue with the idea of crossing boundaries of gender and gender roles, they’re taking issue with the idea of boys being able to be a little girly, and they’re taking issue with the idea that femininity can actually be empowering. They’re showing binary and extremely restrictive ideas of gender and gender roles - basically saying that yes, that boys should be empowered, but God forbid he be both powerful AND feminine!
Also, in terms of the supposed links the show makes to transgenderism, the show is definitely not intended to allegorically about transgender kids, but would there be something wrong with the idea of a boy finding that being a girl or adopting feminine attributes can give strength and clarity? A sense of purpose? I don’t think that’s bad at all! Any show that not only displays femininity as something powerful but also doesn’t shame people for expressing femininity is something a lot of kids of any gender could benefit from!
So if you haven’t, check out She-Zow by going on youtube or checking out The Hub channel! More gender bending TV shows for everyone!
‘Dangerous’ by Vixen Noir
Vixen Noir is a large part of the reason I do the burlesque that I do so I’m pretty excited to follow her music career :)
(i won’t be surprised if I missed one or two)
1.
maybe you win on technicality
but i don’t think
a card game
really counts
2.
even after i plundered your heart
and left a hole
i feel you are still the only one
who loves me
unconditionally
3.
we were each other’s firsts,
in a way
sorry it wasn’t as magical
as we’d like
4.
why did you not tell me sooner?
we could have saved some time
- though perhaps it wasn’t worth
the wait
5.
i wanted to be your experiment
but you disappeared
before i had the courage to ask
for what scares me
6.
i knew my performance was
divinely inspired
but i didn’t expect for it
to turn you over to our side
7.
‘oh shit i am a lesbian’
is a rather awkward statement to make
while lying on my boyfriend’s lap
after beating him
to you
8.
online charm and chemistry
does not always transfer
when real-world chemicals
interfere
9.
you tasted like glitter and grit
i wished your booth
had offered other services
10.
who knew that intellectual fascinations
could one day lead
to physical satisfaction?
11.
people kept claiming
that i was going to be exploited
but these were the best working conditions
i’ve had in a while
12.
while you talked about
office vacuum cleaners exploding
the devices between us
made us explode too
13.
so much for your
highbrow marxist ways
when you’d choose a slap on your body
to a slap to my dignity
14.
the first time i walked in
to see you
straddling him
i cracked up
- fucking finally
15.
i gave up my hurt to you
but you wouldn’t indulge me
in my wish for rose thorns
16.
only two people
know about you
good thing you are paid
to keep secrets
17.
you say i see you
sometimes you see me
and i see love
but sometimes i feel like
you see right past me
18.
your heart was as wrapped in barbed wire
as the subject of your poetry
i am only sorry
i could not leave carnations in
your wmds
19.
apparently we drew an audience
i rather wished we could
have taken things
off-stage
20.
good thing you’ve already had
your birthday
i don’t want to get the website in trouble
21.
when i said you could
bump into me any time
i really did mean it
photos don’t do justice to you
22.
the resemblance is uncanny
and things could have been disturbing
but you gave me what i needed
when i thought i never could
again
23.
i hear you deconstruct and reengineer
pleasure and fun
let me be your test subject
24.
i was mostly drawn to you
because i saw how much you were drawn
to me
i hope you don’t mind being
my ego boost
i.
i am not counting you
i refuse to let you
be my only experience
of what you could have been
ii.
i wish i could count you
but it took me so long
to be able to listen to that song
with your name again
iii.
if you had been
my one and only
i think i would never want
anyone else
SIGNAL BOOST: 3 DAYS LEFT TO RAISE $6000 FOR MASSAGE THERAPY FOR QUEER AND TRANS PEOPLE OF COLOR.
WILD SEED WELLNESS OFFERS AFFORDABLE MASSAGE THERAPY FOR QUEER AND TRANS PEOPLE OF COLOR IN OAKLAND. WE ARE RAISING FUNDS TO SUPPORT 1ST AND 3RD TUESDAYS DONATION-BASED MASSAGE, AND THE COMMUNITY APPRECIATION AND EMERGENCY WELLNESS FUNDS. ALL MONEY GOES TO MAKE MASSAGE THERAPY AVAILABLE TO QUEER AND TRANS PEOPLE OF COLOR. OUR GOAL IS TO RAISE $6000 BY MAY 23RD.
I know in my heart of hearts that creative drive and erotic drive are inextricably and undeniably linked. I can’t write if I can’t come. I can’t feel the peak of a story or a poem if I can’t feel the peak of my own orgasm. I don’t wanna write when I don’t wanna fuck, and I don’t wanna fuck when I don’t wanna write.
‘Straight Up’ by Diana Meyer (cover of Paula Abdul)
I’m slightly obsessed by the original so I’m glad someone did a cover ;)
“Most of us in the goth community recognize a general level of acceptance quite a bit beyond mainstream society. Alternative sexual orientations aren’t given a second thought, trans women largely feel at home in our communities. We honor a broad diversity of body types. By and large we’ve made our spaces open to the darkly inclined.
So, given the fact that there is a consistent experience of marginalization from Afro-Goths; what is it that we’re doing that is making people feel marginalized.”
or really any plan at all.
I have a lot of ideas for what I want to do with my life - from general themes (exploration, travel, creativity, awesomeness) to specific ideas (create an art wedding, get more involved with Alternate Reality Games, go on a creative tour of some kind). Opportunities come up every day and there’s so many I want to partake in.
However, I feel powerless to even dream of anything beyond a few months, let alone years. Mostly because so much of my life is dependent on forces out of my control - specifically, immigration.
I have a student visa in the US up till my program ends in May next year. I may be eligible for Optional Practicum Training, but since I am doing an MFA there isn’t really any clear “practicum” I could participate in (OPT is more common in my school with therapists since my school does largely therapy programs). People have told me about things such as the O Visa, but they seem to be out of my reach. There’s the H1-B visa, but that entails finding a job in a specific industry first, and the competition is intense. I may, maaaaaaayyyy be able to get a Green Card since my aunt applied for my mum and family about 15 years ago but I wouldn’t know till next year and that’s still largely a hypothetical.
I applied for Australian permanent residency in 2009 and have been on a bridging visa ever since. One of the main reasons I’m in the Bay Area now is because I got so fed up of being in bridging visa limbo (hard to get a job, further study comes at the 4x-more-expensive international student rate, can’t get any grants/scholarships/funding for anything) that I figured I’d kill time in a city I love while DIAC gets to my application. In the last month there’s finally been some progress, but also potential bad news: since my sponsor (my aunt) has had to temporarily return to Bangladesh for medical treatment until further notice, DIAC may take this to mean that she is no longer resident in Australia despite being a citizen - and reject my application. My agent is trying to find ways around this but right now it’s up to DIAC.
The only other country I could be in realistically longer-term is Malaysia. A country that gave me so much hassle in giving me citizenship even though I was born and raised there. So much of what I do and want to do isn’t going to be possible there largely for legal reasons - too raunchy, too political, too vice-laden, too queer. Not to mention the intense anti-Bangladeshi sentiment that started with the Ruling Party in the 90s but now includes the so-called “lefty” Opposition - and when your peers are telling you that your concerns about their anti-Bangladeshi racism is irrelevant or that you’re “throwing a tantrum”, you can’t even trust people that are supposed to be your allies. Malaysia is not safe for me unless I go extremely stealth and hide huge chunks of myself - standard practice in a country that doesn’t value individuality, but it means that I can’t really do anything except the status quo.
So much of the resources I tap into go on and on about the importance of long-term involvement. People who claim to want to build community and then disappear after a couple of years are derided as fake. I’ve run into scholarships or grant programs that supposedly welcome international students, but then require that these students have a long-term commitment to the communities they’re in right now.
My ability to commit is out of my hands! I would love to be here for longer than just two years; hell, my graduate program is really Immigration Tax so that I can be here for longer than three months. There’s so much I want to do and build on but my ability is limited by immigration law. I don’t even qualify for a lot of support or funding because I haven’t been here long enough, won’t be here long enough, am just from the wrong place.
I can dream, and oh how I dream. But I can’t even begin to conceive of any of my dreams as possible. There are projects that require plenty of time to implement but time is not a commodity I have. I can only do things that are for the short-term and that don’t take up a lot of resources - major limitations. I am transient by definition, by necessity, by circumstance. I don’t have a home. I may not have a future.
I’ve seen derision for those that don’t think for the long-term. I wish I had that luxury.
With Sydney’s live performance venues constantly facing the threat of survival, supporting the Red Rattler will help to ensure a viable future for the Theatre, where it can become fully self-sufficient and community owned – and not under risk of suffering the fate that other iconic Sydney venues have recently been faced with.
Everything I have done in my life has been part of my effort to carve a space for someone like me: someone who doesn't fit any box and would rather live outside labels. I fight for my identities to be recognised and respected so that others don't have to.
I have 3+ years of experience in creative production, particularly events, performance, and media. With my work (whether self-directed or in collaboration) I often tackle issues of being a queer female migrant minority, looking at the intersections of race, gender, sexuality, and other identity politics.
Besides creative production and performance, I also have years of experience in administration (especially for arts organisations), project management, presenting, customer service, research, and cross-cultural communication. I have made people famous and started plenty of careers with my keen skills of opportunity-hunting & sharing online as well as canny networking skills.
I have a lifetime's worth of writing, been travelling since I was a baby, and practically live on the Internet. I come alive when being with the company of creative, motivated, passionate, compassionate people all supporting each other to be heard, recognised, respected.